The 'Squirrel Slammer' Feeder | Coveside Conservation Eastern White Pine Squirrel Jail Feeder

The Experience

The Coveside Conservation Squirrel Slammer is a eastern white pine squirrel feeder that finally gives the most wanted wildlife outlaws on your property the accommodations their reputation deserves — a fully functioning jailhouse complete with seven vertical dowel bar rods, a sloped roof, and an integrated corn cob screw on the base that turns every feeding visit into a legitimate sentence served. The rough cut eastern white pine construction lends the kind of rustic, handcrafted texture that mass-produced feeders never achieve, and will weather naturally to a lovely gray patina over seasons of outdoor exposure — no painting, no staining, a feeder that gets more characterful with age rather than less. The roomy interior gives squirrels genuine dining comfort behind bars, with an internal ledge beneath the back entry gap providing a dedicated perching spot for extended feeding sessions. A 6-inch access panel on the left side opens for easy interior access — food loading, corn cob placement, and cleaning without removing the feeder from its mount. The gently downward sloping roof sheds rain and debris away from the interior, keeping the Slammer operational through weather that would compromise lesser feeders. A metal bracket on the rear panel mounts to a tree, post, or wall in seconds. Fill it with peanuts, sunflower seed, or impale a corn cob on the integrated base screw, and let the local wildlife check themselves in. Sentence: indefinite. Parole: unlikely.

Scientific Engineering

• Eastern White Pine Construction: The Squirrel Slammer is built from eastern white pine — a lightweight, workable softwood with natural weather resistance that weathers gracefully to a silver-gray patina over seasons of outdoor exposure without treatment, painting, or sealing. Natural knots, grain variation, and color differences between units are inherent characteristics of genuine wood construction, not defects.
• Seven-Rod Dowel Bar Design: Seven vertical dowel rods comprise the front "bars" of the feeder — providing the visual jailhouse aesthetic while allowing unobstructed views into the feeding interior from outside, letting the property steward monitor occupancy and feeding activity without approaching the unit.
• Integrated Corn Cob Mounting Screw: A screw integrated into the feeder's base accepts a standard corn cob for secure, elevated presentation — engaging squirrels in extended feeding sessions that keep them anchored to the Slammer rather than ranging across the property in search of additional food sources.
• Internal Perch Ledge: An internal ledge beneath the rear entry gap provides squirrels a dedicated perching surface for extended dining sessions — comfortable enough to encourage lingering, positioned to maximize the observation value of every feeding visit.
• 6-Inch Left Panel Access: A sizable 6-inch opening on the left panel provides full interior access for food loading, corn cob placement, and cleaning — wide enough to work comfortably without removing the feeder from its mounting hardware.
• Sloped Roof Weather Protection: A gently downward sloping roof directs rain and debris away from the interior feeding area — keeping seed dry and the interior clean through weather exposure that compromises open-platform alternatives.
• Metal Rear Bracket Mounting: An integrated metal bracket on the rear panel provides immediate tree, post, or wall mounting capability without additional hardware.

Boutique & Conservation Values

• Coveside Conservation — Four Decades of Wildlife Housing Craft: Coveside Conservation has been manufacturing conservation-grade wildlife housing and feeding infrastructure in Maine since the 1980s — a production heritage built around the serious wildlife steward rather than the casual garden center buyer. Every Coveside design reflects decades of field feedback from property managers and dedicated backyard conservationists who use these products as working wildlife infrastructure.
• The Observation Opportunity: The Squirrel Slammer's bar design transforms a functional feeding station into a behavioral theater — squirrels visible through the dowel rods, working the corn cob, navigating the interior, performing the full repertoire of squirrel feeding behavior in an enclosed stage that frames every visit as something worth watching.
• Natural Wood Patina: Eastern white pine weathers to a silver-gray patina over seasons of outdoor exposure — a natural aging process that makes the Squirrel Slammer more visually integrated with its garden setting over time, not less. Each unit develops its own character through knot patterns, grain variation, and weathering unique to that piece of wood.
• Proudly Made in the USA: Manufactured by Coveside Conservation in Maine. ✅

Specifications

• Dimensions: 13"W x 8"D x 12.5"H
• Construction: Eastern white pine, metal hardware
• Bar Design: 7 vertical dowel rods
• Access Panel: 6" wide left panel opening
• Mounting: Tree, wall, or post mount — metal rear bracket included
• Compatible Feed: Corn cob, peanuts in shell, mixed seed, cracked corn, sunflower seed
• Country of Origin: Proudly Made in the USA
• Shipping Weight: 6 lbs